EPISODE 17: "We're So Lucky To Be Here"

[00:00:01] Speaker A: Hello. [00:00:02] Speaker B: You guys, stop. Is it Mama Clock yet? I'm going crazy. [00:00:07] Speaker A: Heck yeah, it's Mama Clock somewhere. Look at Bama. He's always in our business. It's so funny. [00:00:33] Speaker B: Very cute. I am so comfortable. I am in a black comfy set. I've never been happier. I walked in, I was like, are you gonna let me wear this? Because I'm not changing. [00:00:43] Speaker A: Like, I don't even say anything to you and you look, can I wear this? And I'm like, yeah, you look cute and comfy. You always look cute and comfy. You don't need my approval. [00:00:50] Speaker B: I do. [00:00:50] Speaker A: But sometimes you do need my approval. [00:00:51] Speaker B: And I also said, can I wear that outfit tonight? I'm going out with my girlfriend tonight. I'm just gonna change quick into that outfit. [00:00:58] Speaker A: Shit for you. [00:00:59] Speaker B: No, I want your sweat and, like, pee stains. Yeah, anything. Episode 17. Should we say that? Yeah. [00:01:08] Speaker A: Okay, you guys, welcome back. Episode 17. [00:01:10] Speaker B: It's Mama Clock. [00:01:12] Speaker A: Not somewhere. [00:01:13] Speaker B: Nope. It's just Mama Clock. [00:01:14] Speaker A: This is Mama Clock. We're so happy you're back. It's been a whirlwind. We're so excited. A lot of new followers. I'm Dominique. This is Emily. We're co host. Host. [00:01:26] Speaker B: Hi, guys. It's me, Anne. [00:01:28] Speaker A: But we're so excited to be back. Another week of Mama Clock. [00:01:32] Speaker B: Yeah, I hope everybody's listening. [00:01:33] Speaker A: Also, I'm so stressed out. [00:01:35] Speaker B: Why? [00:01:36] Speaker A: Because my dear friend, sister, cousin, love, co host star, has a story for me which leads into our entire episode. But she couldn't tell me the story, which means I don't know what we're talking about on this entire episode. [00:01:52] Speaker B: So. [00:01:52] Speaker A: So bear with us. Apparently it's a very serious, dark, very intrusive story. And I have no idea. So you're about to see my first real reaction. [00:02:03] Speaker B: It's really hard to gatekeep when real life things happen to me, and all I wanna do is call her first, but I'm like, can't. I need to save this for the pod because I want authentic reactions. [00:02:12] Speaker A: Yeah. So just bear with us. We're jumping right into it. Not much to talk about besides, thank you for listening. Okay, tune in. [00:02:22] Speaker B: I just want to start out this entire. This is like a. This is a real life thing that happened to me. It was very traumatic. I know I make light of a lot of things and I joke around, but, like, this has really shook me to my core. And I might. [00:02:37] Speaker A: We're getting. We're really getting into it. [00:02:38] Speaker B: Yeah, we're getting into it. [00:02:39] Speaker A: We're really getting into it. Just let everybody know. Like, as you've seen Emily in the past, like, 16 episodes, she makes light of, like. And not even joking, Mana. She's just very light. And that's how she is. She's a light as a feather. Everything is, like, laughing, fun, doesn't matter. Like, we're all good, because life is that way. Like, everything at the end of the day is always going to be okay. But sometimes things shake you, as you said. That's all I know. And we're about to see real time, so let's go. [00:03:04] Speaker B: Yeah. And what I'm going to talk about, it's not about, like, what I saw. It's about, like, what it made me realize. In for life and for everything. But whatever we'll talk about, let me tell the story first. Okay? [00:03:17] Speaker A: I'm freaking out. [00:03:19] Speaker B: Okay. So Saturday night, Joe and I went. We met up with our old honeymoon couple that we haven't seen in seven years. [00:03:27] Speaker A: So you met somebody on your honeymoon? You stayed friends with them? [00:03:30] Speaker B: Yeah, well, they moved. They recently moved back to Westfield, like, a month ago, so. [00:03:33] Speaker A: But you didn't know them prior to going on your honeymoon? [00:03:35] Speaker B: No, no, no. We met on the cruise ship in Italy. [00:03:37] Speaker A: Oh, cool. [00:03:37] Speaker B: Yeah, so. But we, like, stay connected, like, talking, like, nothing crazy throughout the years. But they just moved to Westfield, and the wife reached out to me and she wanted to get together, so I was like, great, that'll be so much fun. We went out to dinner, and then we went back to their house to just have a drink, catch up, whatever. So fun. Love them. And then Joe and I Ubered home. On our Uber ride back home, we were driving down the street, and the Uber driver was like, oh, my God, did you guys just see that? And we were like, see what? Joe and I were, like, not paying attention. He was like, that accident. And Joe was like, turn around. Like, it just happened, the accident. So the Uber driver turned. It was literally made a quick turn, turn around, and there was this car with four girls in the car. And there they spun. They must have spun. I know in retrospect what happened, but I'll just tell you what I knew at the moment. The car, like, spun around. Did you see this hit a parked car? I didn't see the actual action of it happening. We were there, right with the aftermath. We called 911. We stayed with the girls. I'm talking. The car was smashed. One, the driver was stuck in the driver's seat. There was a passenger and two girls in the back. The driver was stuck Smashed, like, her head covered in blood, just stuck. Could not get out. The two girls in the back, one girl was just laying completely lifeless, like, covered in blood. I mean, the car was just all mangled. They were screaming. They were young girls screaming. [00:05:04] Speaker A: Would you say like, 17, 18, like, just got their license. [00:05:06] Speaker B: So the driver was. She was a mom of three, so she was older. And then the other Girls were, like, 19, 20 years old. [00:05:14] Speaker A: They were like, the friends. The friend, yeah, the kids friend. [00:05:17] Speaker B: I'm not sure the relationship, because, like I said, it was a scene from a horror. Like, there was just screaming, there was blood. I was. I was holding the driver's, like, hands. I was like, it's okay. It's gonna be okay. Like, help is on the way. And Joey is trying to keep this one girl literally, like, alive in the backseat. And the one girl didn't make it. But they had to get, like, the Jaws of Life to get the girl out by. Like. But. But not. Long story short. But so I'm trying to stay calm and keep these girls conscious. Like, they were like. Like they were beside themselves. They were just screaming bloody murder. Like, screaming like, help us. Help us. The driver, her leg was stuck. Her leg was, like, mangled. She couldn't not get out of the car. So we didn't want to touch them. There was no help on the way yet. So it was just Joey and I on the scene and my husband, who's, like, so amazing in coma situations where I am not. He was remaining calm, keeping the girls calm, but they were like, kids. So we're like the parents on the accident. So the one girl, I'm whole. I'm hugging her. She's not hurt. I'm hugging her. I'm holding her. She's hysterical. Her mom just passed away last month. She's like, thank you so much. Like, I wouldn't be getting through this without you. Like, I'm. I'm just. Like, it's okay. Like, just breathe. Like, help is on the. We're gonna get you help. So the police came finally, and the ambulance came. The police came, and then the fire trucks came and the ambulance. There was no urgency. Nobody was coming. I don't know what was happening, but nobody was fucking coming. So Joe and I are just, like, they are holding these girls. They're. They have no parents coming. One girl's dad finally came, and, like, he was, like, hugging us, thanking us so much for staying with them. We ubered home at 2am we didn't. I didn't get home to my family. Until 5am we didn't. We wouldn't leave the site because we were taking care of these girls. And it was just like. I closed my eyes. I could just see the blood and the everything of these poor girls. And, like, we realized the next day that the one in the backseat didn't make it. And it's just. It's just like life could change, like, one second. But, like. And being a mom, like, I was trying to remain calm for the mom that was driving because she was stuck. She could not get out of the car. So when the firefighters came, they had to use the jaws of life to get her out of the car, which I couldn't look like. I mean, there was blood dripping everywhere. Joe and I were covered in blood, our clothes, because we were, like, holding onto these girls. [00:07:46] Speaker A: So I don't want to interrupt you because I just can't even imagine, like, the trauma, but I feel like you're so, like, traumatized by this. I feel like I'm trying to, like, portray the situation out. So Uber turns around, you get to the scene. Mom is stuck in the car. You're holding her hands. Joey's in the backseat. There's three girls. You said one of them's out of the car. Two of them are in the car. So two of them in the car, mom in the front seat. One of them is lifeless. The other one's what? [00:08:17] Speaker B: One of them was just walking around in circles on the phone with her boyfriend. But I could tell more about the story after what I. [00:08:23] Speaker A: So the one that was lifeless, like, why was she. The one hurt so badly? [00:08:27] Speaker B: So she was in the backseat without a seatbelt, and she was lying down like they were drunk. It was a drunk driver. I mean, the. The mom was drunk. [00:08:35] Speaker A: Yeah, she was drunk. Wait a minute. You didn't. You didn't preference that? [00:08:40] Speaker B: Oh, sorry, I forgot to tell that part. Well, so I'm just confused. [00:08:44] Speaker A: A mom of three were. Those are three kids. [00:08:46] Speaker B: None of them were her kids. She had young kids, so I don't know. They were friends. She was a young mom. Like, a young. Like, not like us. Like, but if she. I don't know why. She was drunk. She was that junk. But she was like. She had alcohol. Like, she's getting charged for dui. No, no, someone died drinking under the influence. [00:09:04] Speaker A: And also, yeah, homicide. [00:09:06] Speaker B: Homicide with more vehicular manslaughter, which is. [00:09:10] Speaker A: Like, terrible, because that's, like, not what's vehicular means. [00:09:15] Speaker B: It's not like aggravated assault. It's like somebody died while you were on your influence. [00:09:19] Speaker A: So. [00:09:19] Speaker B: Which is just sad in itself. I mean, she should not have been drinking, but like now she has to go to jail because of what she did. And her friend died. Like it just. [00:09:28] Speaker A: So Joey was holding onto the lifeless. So she said we didn't want to. [00:09:33] Speaker B: Move anybody because of like. [00:09:35] Speaker A: Right, of course you can't. [00:09:36] Speaker B: And also the girl, she wasn't lifeless. Like she was alive when we were there, but she was unconscious. Her half her head like got like chopped. Like it's like the top of her head was like it was. And so Joe was like kind of holding her up, like holding her like this just so like, should I just keep her like, you know, like in a movie where you're like, just keep, like, talk to me, talk to me like that. So it was like that and I was doing that with the, with the driver because she was just, she was panicking. [00:10:07] Speaker A: Just stuck it up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. [00:10:08] Speaker B: And the one other girl who was just circling around on the phone with her boyfriend was like not doing anything, which come we come to realize she got an argument with the driver and she took the wheel and spun the wheel because she was mad at the driver. And the driver tried to get control of the wheel again, but they spun out of control and that's how the whole accident happened. [00:10:33] Speaker A: Oh my God. First of all, I'm so sorry you had to go through that. [00:10:36] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:10:37] Speaker A: But Samaritans, good Samaritans, you turn the fuck around when you. The Uber driver. Where's the Uber driver? [00:10:43] Speaker B: Well, he was there too. He was an emt. So he was like, wow, that's a. [00:10:47] Speaker A: Huge part of the story though. [00:10:49] Speaker B: It's all choppy, but yes. [00:10:51] Speaker A: So he was an EMT. [00:10:52] Speaker B: He was an EMT. He empty EMT mount. He called 911 because Joe and I would. I just like immediately went into like mama bear mode because like they were just like. [00:11:02] Speaker A: You were just being there for that. [00:11:04] Speaker B: And like Joe was just being like a man. A man. Like, which was like so hot. But like, but like. And then there was like a lot of stuff where I just like had to walk away. I couldn't. I couldn't be watching. [00:11:19] Speaker A: Like I. Oh, that's something. I mean, they are traumatized with us for life. But like also you saw all that too, so that's traumatizing as well. [00:11:26] Speaker B: Yeah. And I mean, Joe and I, we went home. We like. First of all, I forgot to call my mom because in all of this we had an 8:30 dinner reservation. We didn't get home till 5am My poor mother. Yeah, she had this awful feeling that we got in a car accident. We come home, we're covered in blood. She was like, I didn't. I never called her because I was too traumatic. I was too. [00:11:44] Speaker A: Yeah. Shooken up. [00:11:45] Speaker B: So she. Thank God. She was like, thank God it wasn't you guys. But like call me. I was like mom, I was dealing with a lot, so. But my mom actually. So I did. I ended up calling her like when things were calming down. But she, I, I butt dialed her. Like I was in the pocket, she was still in my pocket. And she actually heard one of the girls being like, thank you so much. Like you really were like a mom to me for this. Like, thank you. Which was like, I am freaking out. [00:12:10] Speaker A: There's so many moving parts. Uber driver was an emt. [00:12:13] Speaker B: Emt. [00:12:13] Speaker A: He saw it, turned around. You both got out of the car. You were with a girl taking care of her when her mom just passed away a month ago. Joey was holding. [00:12:22] Speaker B: She was, she was not hurt. She was shaken up. The one that the mom passed away a month ago, she, she, it was just like her friends all bloody like. I think she was in the left side with her seatbelt on. Yeah, it seemed. And that was the side that didn't. [00:12:36] Speaker A: Get seat belt saves lives. It's not even funny. Front seat, backseat, third row. Put your fucking seatbelt on. Always people die. I'm sure the one who didn't have her seatbelt on like flew through the windshield and back. [00:12:50] Speaker B: Yeah, I mean I pretty sure that's what happened. I mean she was. [00:12:54] Speaker A: So how did you find out she passed? [00:12:57] Speaker B: We, we looked it up after. Yeah. [00:13:01] Speaker A: Where are they from? [00:13:05] Speaker B: I think Plainfield. [00:13:07] Speaker A: Shocked. It like, wasn't like. [00:13:08] Speaker B: Yeah, it might be. And it might, it might be in the news. We, we tried to look it up like on like the news, but it wasn't on the news. We had to look it up. And one of the, one of the firefighters is actually on scene was my ex sister in law. So she was, she was there inside. [00:13:26] Speaker A: No way. [00:13:26] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:13:27] Speaker A: And she was the one who showed up? [00:13:29] Speaker B: Yeah, she was the firefighter uncle, which I hadn't seen in. [00:13:32] Speaker A: Did you see her years? [00:13:33] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:13:33] Speaker A: I mean, was she like, what are you doing here? [00:13:35] Speaker B: It was Joe and I covered in blood in an accident. She came up to us and said, are you guys okay? [00:13:40] Speaker A: So I don't know what this meant for you. All in all, I'm so happy the ones that survived are okay and are doing well. Drinking and driving, not okay. Not wearing a seatbelt. Not okay. The one who passed away, like, her family, like, her. Her friends, like, gone. When something like this happens, like, you're gone and that's it. Like, you have to remember that, and I don't. And back to my point, I don't know what this means for you or what God was trying to tell you and your husband or what this was supposed to be for. [00:14:12] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:14:13] Speaker A: But I truly believe, like, this. [00:14:16] Speaker B: And. [00:14:16] Speaker A: But you've never. Like, you're not the. Even the girl who drives without her seatbelt or unsafe. But I don't know what this meant. But it meant something for you. [00:14:23] Speaker B: I know. And. [00:14:24] Speaker A: But what does it mean? Like, tell me what you. Like, what did it. What did that. [00:14:27] Speaker B: I mean, I'm always somebody who tries to live life to the fullest. Every moment counts. Love. Hug the ones you love. But, like, just seeing something so horrific and, like, it could have been us. It could have been anybody. It could have been my kids. Like, I honestly, that's. We're gonna go into this episode, like, I just thought about if, like, my kids were driving. Like, a random mom was there, like, trying to, like, help them. And, like, it's just. Life can change in an instant. [00:14:53] Speaker A: Listen, I'm sure what you did for those kids are going to. [00:15:00] Speaker B: Is he okay? Is he crying? [00:15:01] Speaker A: I'm freaking real crying. [00:15:03] Speaker B: Does he do that? Is he okay? [00:15:05] Speaker A: Emma. [00:15:06] Speaker B: He's sad. [00:15:08] Speaker A: Sometimes, like, humans come through dogs. Swear to God. [00:15:11] Speaker B: I mean, that was weird. [00:15:13] Speaker A: But what I'm saying is, like, they. You will stick in their mind the rest of their lives. [00:15:19] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:15:20] Speaker A: Like, what you did for those girls probably meant more than you even can imagine. [00:15:25] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:15:25] Speaker A: And I'm sure what you saw, like, is going to traumatize you for a long time. I hope you learn a lesson. Like, not that you needed to, but I hope, like, you take that, which I feel like you have because you said that to me, but I can't even imagine. Like, I just. I'm sick. Like, that makes me sick. [00:15:39] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:15:40] Speaker A: I just. It could be anybody. You're so right. [00:15:42] Speaker B: Yeah. I mean, I know, like, we say that all the time, but, like, when something like this and you actually see it and you're there, it's just like. [00:15:48] Speaker A: It's different. [00:15:49] Speaker B: It's different. It hits you in a different way. And you. You kind of. You think about your life and you think about your kids and you think about, like, what. What if. What if you die? Like, where your kids gonna go? What's gonna happen? And Joe and I, like, had some we had life conversations after it because we were really shooken up. [00:16:06] Speaker A: Like, I mean, like, this is the type of shit like that shakes people up for a while. And you need to have those conversations because that's like so normal. Like, things like this are traumatizing for people. [00:16:18] Speaker B: Yeah. And we decided that if we ever die in a car accident, you and Mike have to take our kids. [00:16:23] Speaker A: First of all. Absolutely. I'm honored too, but God forbid, that is just like. So let me ask you something. Did you and Joey have your seatbelts on in the Uber? In the backseat? Be honest. [00:16:34] Speaker B: Yes, yes, I, Yes, I had something. But I also. I know I didn't want to start with this because it was so serious, but I was so fud up. I had about seven dirty martinis before that. I had a night. [00:16:47] Speaker A: Oh, so you were wasted. [00:16:49] Speaker B: I was. I wasn't. I was like, wasted, but that. [00:16:52] Speaker A: I was that shit. Fucking. [00:16:53] Speaker B: So that sobers you up so quick. [00:16:56] Speaker A: You were probably like more sober than you've ever been in your life. [00:16:58] Speaker B: Well, I would have been if the, the husband that we were with, he also gave me some. It's called goo. It's an edible. It's called goo. I don't know if anybody heard of it. [00:17:07] Speaker A: You don't know? Giving you something, you taking it. Go ahead. [00:17:09] Speaker B: I mean, we were having fun. We were playing cards, like, whatever. We took an edible. We did that on our honeymoon. [00:17:13] Speaker A: Oh, I think with the husband on the scene. [00:17:14] Speaker B: No, no, no, no. [00:17:15] Speaker A: Oh, the husband. [00:17:16] Speaker B: And no, when we were having dinner. [00:17:17] Speaker A: Oh, okay. Makes more sense. [00:17:18] Speaker B: So I was, I was feeling great. Like, you know, I like my edibles. And then I, I'm hit with this and I am tripping ball sacks in the worst way ever. Like, it was just so bad for me. I, it was a really bad, bad, bad. I mean, I got sober because of the situation, but I, I, I was, I was really, really shaken up. Probably more so than I. I mean, it was all awful, but. Yeah. [00:17:42] Speaker A: I'm so sorry for everybody involved. [00:17:46] Speaker B: Yeah, I mean, it was really, it was a horror scene. [00:17:49] Speaker A: If anybody's ready on fudgeing scene with that shit, it's your husband. [00:17:52] Speaker B: Now, he was, he was cool. [00:17:53] Speaker A: Common collection hero, but sure. [00:17:55] Speaker B: But it, but it did like, he. [00:17:57] Speaker A: You have tear. [00:17:58] Speaker B: I know. [00:17:58] Speaker A: Lying. [00:17:59] Speaker B: My makeup is ruined. [00:18:00] Speaker A: It's okay. Cover it with your hair. [00:18:01] Speaker B: No, it's just tap. [00:18:03] Speaker A: Fine. [00:18:03] Speaker B: Cover. You're covered. [00:18:04] Speaker A: Your hair's covering it. [00:18:05] Speaker B: But it shook him up too, because, I mean, we've never seen anything like that. [00:18:10] Speaker A: Yeah, unless you're watching a movie. [00:18:11] Speaker B: But I do have to say, the firefighters, policemen on call, we're not phased. They say they see this shit all the time. I'm like, what do you mean you see the shit? I mean, obviously they do, but I guess that's, that's their job. Like, they, like, imagine taking that home every day after everything they say it takes. Yeah. So, like, I am not that person. I can never be a nurse. I can never be a doctor. I can. [00:18:33] Speaker A: I feel things. I would feel bad for those rest. [00:18:36] Speaker B: Of my life, and that's how I am. Like, I, I'm thinking about it, like. [00:18:39] Speaker A: If the one that died, I can't even. [00:18:41] Speaker B: No, I, I mean, we like, to. [00:18:45] Speaker A: The father, there was only one parent on scene. [00:18:47] Speaker B: Only one parent came after a while. The, the girl that was it late. [00:18:51] Speaker A: Like, no one was awake. [00:18:52] Speaker B: It was 3am so no one was answering that phone. I mean, I don't know, but that. [00:18:56] Speaker A: Is a parent's worst nightmare ever, Ever, ever. [00:19:00] Speaker B: Yeah, so that is. [00:19:02] Speaker A: I'm just confused by the dynamic, though. But not that you're gonna have these answers. Mom of three with three kids. [00:19:07] Speaker B: She was a young mom. She was like a. [00:19:09] Speaker A: Just three kids. M. She could be that young. [00:19:11] Speaker B: She was young. [00:19:12] Speaker A: Like 25. [00:19:13] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:19:14] Speaker A: With three children. [00:19:15] Speaker B: I mean, I didn't, I could not. She wasn't speaking. [00:19:18] Speaker A: I know, but, like, that's crazy. I'm just so confused. Like, why is she driving three teenagers around? [00:19:23] Speaker B: It was just like me. It would be like me out with my friends if I was a young mom. It was like she wasn't like, the mom driving. [00:19:30] Speaker A: That's right. That's what I'm picturing. So it's like you three kids, your friends don't have. Some of them don't have kids. Like, you're driving them. [00:19:34] Speaker B: Yeah. Yes. [00:19:36] Speaker A: You just made it seem to me that it was like a mom. It was young kids. [00:19:40] Speaker B: No, okay. Not young. I mean, they were young, but, like, in their teens. 19, 20. [00:19:45] Speaker A: Okay. [00:19:45] Speaker B: Young adults. [00:19:46] Speaker A: Young adults. Wow. That just took a lot out of me. [00:19:50] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:19:51] Speaker A: So what are we talking about? Where do, where do we go from here with that? [00:19:55] Speaker B: I want to talk about when real life just smacks you in the face. And if you've ever felt like something that traumatic happened to you, whether it was like, an accident, an ER situation, a health scare, and if you think about just, like, life differently, like now. I, I, I honestly do think about, like I said, like, I, I, I haven't really thought about what would happen to me if I died. But, like, if I did, like, I. I can't think about what my kids would do. But, like, I. I really would need somebody to, like, act like me, like, to my kids. Like, I. I, like, I don't care. [00:20:27] Speaker A: Like, that's where your mind is. You're like, if I'm not here, I need somebody to act like me. I don't want somebody. Just take care of my kids. I want somebody to, like, do it. [00:20:34] Speaker B: Like me. Yeah. [00:20:35] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:20:36] Speaker B: And then intrusive thoughts. Like, so now I've been dealing with just, like, crazy things, like, I guess is like, anxiety and the dark side of mom brain, like, now. But I feel like a lot of moms have intrusive thoughts. Like, we talked about it postpartum, but, like, obviously, when something traumatic happens to you and you see these things and you think about these things, like, thoughts come into your mind. Like. [00:21:01] Speaker A: So what thoughts are coming into your mind? [00:21:03] Speaker B: I mean, I. I just. When I'm driving now, I just. I. I was picturing, like, just the car crashing and then like. Like I'm picturing me laying there. Like, I saw the girl just, like, covered in blood and just dead. Like, nobody's helping. [00:21:17] Speaker A: That's what, like, going through your mind. [00:21:18] Speaker B: When you're driving the car like it is this past week. That's what's been happening to me. And, I mean, I'm gonna be okay. Everything's. I'm dealing with it, but, like, it just. It shakes you. It shakes. It shook me to my core to see these poor people. Just, like. I don't. I honestly don't think I've ever seen, like, a dead person before. [00:21:38] Speaker A: I mean, like. I mean, besides, it's even like, I am holding back, like, a lot of emotions right now, but I can't imagine, like, actually being on scene. Like, it is so different when you talk about it to when you're actually there. [00:21:52] Speaker B: Yeah, I mean, I'm picturing, like. [00:21:54] Speaker A: I'm trying to picture it like a. [00:21:55] Speaker B: Grey's Anatomy scene picture, but 12 times. [00:21:57] Speaker A: And it was dark. [00:21:58] Speaker B: And it was dark. And there was, like, five firefighters. [00:22:02] Speaker A: What kind of car were they driving? [00:22:03] Speaker B: They were driving a gray Honda Civic and, like, a little car, and I don't know, they hit a Jeep, like, a parked Jeep. And I remember, like, how did it get so bad? [00:22:15] Speaker A: Because the seat belts or because how they hit, like, where were you on. [00:22:18] Speaker B: Like, on 7th Ave. I don't know if you know 7th Ave. We were just on the. I drive this road every day to get to your house. I drive this road you just drove. [00:22:26] Speaker A: Past it when you got came here? [00:22:27] Speaker B: Well, actually, no, I went a different way. But I drive that road like a lot of. A lot of the time. [00:22:33] Speaker A: So they hit a parked car in a driveway or like a street. [00:22:36] Speaker B: So we didn't see the accident actually happen and we didn't actually see the accident report. I know most of the information from my ex sister in law who told her mom and my mom works with her mom. Big tangled mess over there. But anyway, what was I saying? [00:22:55] Speaker A: No, I just had a question because you said when you were telling me the story with your brother and he was like, I don't like the way you handled. What other way are you supposed to handle that? [00:23:05] Speaker B: Don't know. [00:23:06] Speaker A: What did you do that was like not handled correctly? [00:23:09] Speaker B: I talked to her. [00:23:10] Speaker A: Yeah, that is. [00:23:12] Speaker B: And hugged. She like she gave us a hug. Yeah. [00:23:16] Speaker A: I'm. No words. None. Absolute zero. Not about him, not about anybody else, but yeah, the poor children who died. [00:23:23] Speaker B: Yeah. So I should have left the scene right then and there once I saw her. That was. I handled myself completely wrong. [00:23:29] Speaker A: What? [00:23:30] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:23:31] Speaker A: Okay. [00:23:31] Speaker B: Anywho, that's crazy. Yeah. [00:23:36] Speaker A: Well, like, what else are you feeling? I just feel like. I know these things are hard for you to talk about because you're unsure of the feelings because you've never felt them before. But like. Yeah, what else? Like, do you feel like, are you, are you. Do. Do you feel like extra cautious with your kids now? Like are you or. [00:23:50] Speaker B: No, no, it's not even like that. I think it really just made me think about me dying and like what would happen to my kids if God forbid, it was me and my husband. [00:24:01] Speaker A: Well, now. And not that the mother of three died, but she's going to spend a lot of time in prison. [00:24:06] Speaker B: Right. And now that's another thing. [00:24:08] Speaker A: Like that as well be dead. [00:24:09] Speaker B: I don't drink and drive, but like if I ever were like that right. There is a fucking wake up call. Like you have children at home and you're going to risk. God forbid you risk your own life, but like now you're going to jail because you hurt someone else's life and that's just a law. Yeah. So like that made me. That made me think a lot about that I talk. It made me think a lot about like talking to my kids about like just like hard situations and like, not that I have to talk to them about death or anything, but like they're not gonna understand. Yeah. But like, I don't know, just how you. How I would deal with it. Like age Appropriate honesty versus pretending like nothing happened if somebody close to them died. Like, I don't know, it just made me really think about, like, a lot of mortality, which is dark and sad. But, like, that's life. Life and death. [00:24:56] Speaker A: Like, honestly, people don't realize. People say all the time, life's so short, like, enjoy. But it's sometimes so hard to remember that because you have your own issues going on in your life. You have these different feelings that you feel all the time when. What helps me? No joke, I've never told anybody this helps me through, like, intrusive thoughts or anxiety or hard times. I say to myself, like, not in these exact words, but, like, one, none of these feelings has ever killed anybody. Like, get over it because I'm like, hard on myself in that way. Or two, like, people are dying. Yeah, people are dying. Or people die tragically. Non. Tragically. Like, why am I wasting my week, my days, my months, whatever it is, thinking about these things, stressing over these things. Like, that's what helps me get through. [00:25:45] Speaker B: I think about that a lot. [00:25:46] Speaker A: It's like. And it's not even like, life's too short. Like, it's so cliche, but it's so fucking true that life that you witness is gone. Her parents are going to suffer for the rest of life. She'll never be married with children. Like, it makes me sick to my stomach that people take life for granted. It's true. And I say this to. I say this to my family on a daily. We're wasting. Especially my mom. You're wasting your time and your life worrying about this when you could be focusing on this. You have a whole rest of your life to live. Why are we stressing about X, Y and Z? It's not fair to you. Yeah, people are dying. Like, what do you have to. What do I have to say? Do you have to see a dead body on scene like you did to realize that people are like, it's just like, people don't realize, like, it's so true that, like, life. Life is. Can be over in a matter of seconds. [00:26:44] Speaker B: It really can. And I think that is really. And I know that, like, this, this has. This happened. And I'm sure I'll. I'll forget about it a little bit, like, in months and life moves on and that's what happens. But like, when you get a wake up call like this and I'm in right now, I truly want to just, like, enjoy my babies at home. Like, just like, like enjoy this time with us. Like, I just like, I'm going out with my girlfriends tonight. Like, I'm so excited to just like get out. Like, just enjoy every single thing that. [00:27:13] Speaker A: Like, you ever do. [00:27:13] Speaker B: Like, because we're living and breathing and like, we're just lucky to be here. [00:27:17] Speaker A: Yeah, you're so right. And it does, it like pulls like an emotional feeling out of me too, because it's like I. I'm like a culprit of like wasting my energy on things. [00:27:27] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:27:28] Speaker A: And thinking about things. And honestly, like, you telling me story kind of like pulls out a wake up call in me. [00:27:34] Speaker B: It's like whatever you were thinking about doesn't matter. [00:27:36] Speaker A: It doesn't matter. And like the people that you're arguing with right now or fighting with or have issues with because of this situation that like, at the end of the day it doesn't matter. And I'm not saying to make up with everybody in your life. I'm not saying that. But what I am saying to go against that is move on with your life. Enjoy. Forget about what has happened. Don't let that, don't harp on it. They did what they did, they said what they said. Whether it's your family, your friend, your cousin, your aunt, your uncle, your kids, move on, enjoy your life. Spend the time with the people that you should be spending time with because. [00:28:11] Speaker B: You have one life to live and that's it. [00:28:13] Speaker A: Can I just say something really quick because this is going to make me very emotional and I feel like I've said this to you. I feel like you were the reason why I. You are the reason why. I feel like I could say to myself, like, move on. Like, life is short because I can't think of another phrase. Like, I feel like you. Not without you even saying it, you help me and guide me in a direction of like, spending time with the people you need to spend time. And like, I am that person. Right. But it's hard because, like, sometimes people around me, like, don't have that drive that I do. I've always wanted people to be together. I always bring everybody together. But sometimes I say it, but don't live it. [00:28:57] Speaker B: Right. [00:28:59] Speaker A: And I feel like since like the past couple years we've been close, I've really, like, executed on that and I feel like you are my reason. [00:29:10] Speaker B: Well, that's really, really, really, really sweet and makes me feel really good because. [00:29:16] Speaker A: I don't know, I mean, those people are like. I have to say those people are damn fucking lucky that you were there and, and your husband. [00:29:22] Speaker B: Yeah. Like, I felt good about your actions My husband will say that I like, ran around like a chicken, screaming probably. But in my mind I was cool, calm to them, to the mom, at least. [00:29:33] Speaker A: Some people need that, though. Whatever you gave. [00:29:35] Speaker B: Yeah, I mean, whatever. [00:29:36] Speaker A: We were meant to be there at that time. You were meant. Your Uber was meant to turn around. Can I ask what the EMT did? [00:29:42] Speaker B: The uber or the EMT driver? [00:29:44] Speaker A: The Uber. He said the Uber was an EMT. [00:29:46] Speaker B: He. He didn't do anything. He just called 91 1. He was like, I actually, if you're an EMT, you're not allowed to leave or something. [00:29:52] Speaker A: That's why you're not allowed to do anything. [00:29:54] Speaker B: No, he wasn't allowed to leave. So that's why we also were just there. I mean, it was 3am we'd have to call another Uber. But yeah, it was a. A real life opener. Eye opener. I open eye opener for life. [00:30:09] Speaker A: You just said life. And I, in one sense, I can't believe that happened to you and you didn't call me at 3 o' clock in the morning. [00:30:17] Speaker B: I wanted to, but. [00:30:18] Speaker A: You should have called me to come get you. I would have gotten. [00:30:20] Speaker B: Yeah, I could have done that too. But I mean, we were not leaving. And those girls, they. They really. I mean, they were scared. They were. [00:30:30] Speaker A: One thing you take out of it that maybe. I know the whole thing was traumatic and changed your perspective, but what was one thing on scene that you're, like, taking with you forever? [00:30:39] Speaker B: Taking with me forever, honestly, was the tightest hug that the one girl gave me. And she just thanked me, like, from the bottom of her soul for, like, talking her through being there, making sure that she was okay. Like, her mom just passed away. I can't imagine, like, the trauma of your mom dying and then like, being in a really fatal car accident. Like, just being there for her is gonna. [00:31:02] Speaker A: Oh, yeah. I hope that you come in contact with her. [00:31:06] Speaker B: Yeah, I. We got only one of their names, but, like, not last names. I don't know if we'll see them, but maybe they'll hear this. If you're listening, I'm. I. I feel for you guys. [00:31:16] Speaker A: Oh, yeah. Wow. [00:31:18] Speaker B: Yeah. Deep, heavy shit. Should we get into a game? So I stopped trying. [00:31:22] Speaker A: You want to take a drink? [00:31:23] Speaker B: Oh, yeah, that'd be good. [00:31:25] Speaker A: I'm so sorry. I mean, like, life is short, man. I just. I honestly, like, I'm thankful that I don't have trauma. I don't think, like, what I do is, I, like, it leaves my brain, so I could very well be missing something that Happened in my life and I blocked out. But honestly, I would obviously, like, all. [00:31:42] Speaker B: Jokes, not like a. [00:31:44] Speaker A: My dad, like, got into a boating accident and lost his whole face and now has one eye. So, like, that was trauma to him. I can't imagine how he lives, like, you know, his life. He happened in his 20s. He's been blind in one eye. Like, imagine that happening when you were in your 22. [00:32:02] Speaker B: Does he have a glass eye? [00:32:03] Speaker A: Yeah. Comes in and out. But imagine you're 22 years old. You're young, wild and free. You're dating. [00:32:08] Speaker B: Oh, I can't imagine. [00:32:09] Speaker A: And you nearly die. He was dead. [00:32:11] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:32:11] Speaker A: And then you live the rest of your life blind. Like, I can't even. That's why I feel so much connection to my dad. [00:32:17] Speaker B: Do you think that he lives his life in a certain way because of that accident? [00:32:20] Speaker A: I do, but I also think he suffers deeply, quietly. [00:32:26] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:32:26] Speaker A: Because of that. [00:32:27] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:32:28] Speaker A: I mean, that is more than traumatic. [00:32:30] Speaker B: Oh, my God. [00:32:31] Speaker A: And he does all the things he's not afraid to do. One thing, he's still on a boat, racing, speeding like a lunatic. [00:32:36] Speaker B: Yeah. But that's crazy in itself that he. [00:32:39] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:32:40] Speaker B: And my mom says you never do it again. [00:32:43] Speaker A: Or like you're traumatized for the rest of your life or you, like, are traumatized quietly and you kind of just like live your life same, but maybe even more extra. My mom tells me this and always stick with me every year at the same time. His boating accent, I think was say like April. I forget what month it was. Every year at the same time, my dad gets away. My dad will say to my mom, like, I don't know why I feel this way. I don't feel. My mom's like, hun, it's the time of the year of your boating accent. 30 years ago. That's how crazy your body works. [00:33:12] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:33:13] Speaker A: Same time every year it gets whacked out. [00:33:15] Speaker B: I believe it. [00:33:15] Speaker A: So anyway, I personally have never suffered. I guess like, the only time I kind of. Something kind of altered my brain was my brother was away at school in Florida. He went to school in Florida and he got into a really bad car accident and he called my mom. And I remember this kind of traumatized me. I remember being upstairs and my mom was downstairs and her phone rang and all I remember hearing was, my son is dead. That's all I remember hearing. Because my brother on the other line was screaming, yeah, Mom, I got into a bad car accident. There's blood all over me. I can't move. I'm stuck. I Can't breathe. This is that. So my mom was like, my son is dead. It was a whole thing. And he ends, obviously, is completely fine. I mean, that's the reason why I didn't go to school in Florida, because I was supposed to. [00:34:00] Speaker B: Wow. [00:34:00] Speaker A: Is the reason I didn't go far away from school. In college, I went to Long island for school. I was supposed to go to, like, coastal Carolina or I applied to Florida as well, but I just. I didn't want to go a plane ride because of that incident. It's the reason why for so long, every time the phone rang. Oh, yeah, I was traumatized. I mean, that kind of shook me a little bit because I couldn't even imagine, like, something happened to my brother. Like, I would probably be dead myself. But also as like, a parent now, I can't imagine my mom. I would think, like, I mean, imagine being a plane right away and your. Your son calling you, saying, like, dying, no, I can't. [00:34:30] Speaker B: And I always. It's. It sticks with me because my mom always says. I might have said this on my earlier episode, that, like, when my brother and I were home living under her roof, she would be so happy knowing that, like, I was in my bed or my crib and my brother was in his bed. His crib, like, up until we were teenagers. Like, and on the news, it'll be like, it's 10 o'. Clock. Do you know where your children are? [00:34:51] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:34:51] Speaker B: And she'd be like, yes. Like, they're safe in bed. And then, like, one day, like, your kids go to college and, like, you don't have to. [00:34:57] Speaker A: How did my mom survive? [00:34:58] Speaker B: No. And I asked my mom. I was like, how. I was at Rutgers. Like, I was. I could be dead in New Brunswick ditch every night. And you have no idea that if I'm home. How do you do that? [00:35:06] Speaker A: I can't. [00:35:07] Speaker B: How. How as a mother, do you. Can you, like, go to bed every night when your kids aren't just safe in their cribs? [00:35:14] Speaker A: So, like, was she just, like, stressed out? She said that my mom absolutely was stressed out. [00:35:18] Speaker B: She said every night, like, she just prayed that we were home. Most nights I would text her, like, I'm home. I'm safe. Like, just to give her a peace of mind. Which, looking back, like, I. I'm. I need my kids to do that, like, hands down, every single time for me, because I won't be able to. [00:35:34] Speaker A: I feel like I'm gonna be bad, too. [00:35:35] Speaker B: But she said after, like, a while, you kind of just, like, just like with anything in life, like, you just get used to it. Like you have no other choice. Your babies are grown up, they're away. [00:35:46] Speaker A: Mind over matter. Like you just kind of block it out. [00:35:48] Speaker B: Yeah. But like now I'm just. Like, I'm. Because of this trauma, but, like, just with everything, like, I'm just so happy to know that my babies are home safe at night in their cribs. [00:36:00] Speaker A: Like anything could happen ever. [00:36:01] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:36:02] Speaker A: Like, I don't think that way. And I'm happy I don't. Because I would probably be crippled with anxiety. [00:36:06] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:36:07] Speaker A: But I mean, my mom definitely suffers from an anxiety where she has a fear of like, death. [00:36:12] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:36:13] Speaker A: So, like, that's like hard to live. Like, imagine being scared of what you just went through. Like every day. Like that happening. [00:36:19] Speaker B: Yeah. I mean, you need to dedicate it. Yeah. [00:36:21] Speaker A: People do. [00:36:22] Speaker B: Like, if I. I think I'm going to be okay, but like, if you never have my intrusive thoughts, like, continue. Like, I would think about, like, talking to somebody because. [00:36:30] Speaker A: Absolutely. [00:36:31] Speaker B: The thoughts. This game. [00:36:33] Speaker A: Let's play. [00:36:33] Speaker B: I would play. It's called intrusive. Intrusive thoughts are totally reasonable. So I'm going to say. [00:36:39] Speaker A: Explain that to me. [00:36:40] Speaker B: I'm going to say an intrusive thought and you tell me if you think this is an intrusive thought that I've actually had, or you personally. Me personally. [00:36:49] Speaker A: If you actually had this thought. [00:36:51] Speaker B: Hold on. [00:36:52] Speaker A: Or you're saying if it's like, okay, that's okay that you're thinking that way, or. No, you need to be medicated if you're thinking this. [00:36:56] Speaker B: Yes. [00:36:57] Speaker A: Okay. Is that what you mean? [00:36:57] Speaker B: Yes. [00:36:58] Speaker A: Okay. But so what you just said, it makes no sense. [00:37:00] Speaker B: Well, because I. Because then I made an actual list of some. [00:37:03] Speaker A: Your own. I mean, you say that after, like, your own. [00:37:06] Speaker B: So some of these are my own. But some of them are made up. [00:37:09] Speaker A: But can you tell me if they're yours or not? [00:37:11] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:37:11] Speaker A: Okay, go ahead. [00:37:12] Speaker B: Okay. What if the ceiling fan falls and decapitates us mid nap? [00:37:16] Speaker A: Medicated. You need to be medicated. Is that. [00:37:19] Speaker B: No, I don't think. But my girlfriend is. My girlfriend is deathly afraid of ceiling fans. She thinks the. The blade will come and chop her head off. Yeah. She's like. Like freaking. But people. That's what people think. [00:37:31] Speaker A: I know. [00:37:31] Speaker B: That's intrusive thought. [00:37:32] Speaker A: I know. [00:37:32] Speaker B: Okay, ready? [00:37:33] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:37:36] Speaker B: What if I trip while carrying this baby down the stairs and we both fall straight into the drywall? [00:37:40] Speaker A: Unrealistic. Okay. [00:37:42] Speaker B: Most intrusive thoughts are unrealistic. Yeah, but not medicated. Not medicated. I didn't have that one. But that I think people do. What if I forget to put the stroller brakes on and the kids roll straight into the pool? [00:37:53] Speaker A: Not medicated. Like that's okay thought, because I've had like I've been walking the dog and the baby on a sidewalk down a hill and I forgot and the baby was rolling. Like I caught it in two seconds. But it's like it can happen. Yes, but that's like easy. Like you have to think about it. This. If that actually happened, you'd see it rolling, you'd get to it before it gets the pool. And even if it gets in the pool. [00:38:13] Speaker B: No. So like every time I'm at your mother in law's house, actually I. So Rocco is always in the stroller, like around the pool? Cause there's nothing. [00:38:20] Speaker A: Yeah, I never thought about that. [00:38:22] Speaker B: So I always. This is my own intrusive thought. I always picture him just like going into the pool, already strapped in, me diving in, having to unstrap the things and get him out of the pool. [00:38:31] Speaker A: You can also like try to pick the stroller up itself and try instead. [00:38:34] Speaker B: Of getting him out. Imagine how heavy the stroller would be in a pool. [00:38:37] Speaker A: No, I can't imagine. [00:38:38] Speaker B: I don't even know what you do. What's the right way? How do you get a kid out? But that's the same thing. [00:38:41] Speaker A: That's an intrusive thought though. Obviously. Go ahead. It's severe. But like, if you're thinking about it, it's a depends. Like if you think about it every day, it's like it's. [00:38:48] Speaker B: You know, what if the baby monitor isn't glitching and someone's hacking watching us? [00:38:53] Speaker A: That's crazy. [00:38:54] Speaker B: I mean, that happens. [00:38:55] Speaker A: Does it? [00:38:55] Speaker B: Yeah. You haven't heard stories? [00:38:57] Speaker A: I don't have a camera. [00:38:58] Speaker B: Oh, you know cameras. I think about this a lot. [00:39:00] Speaker A: That's actually really scary. I'm thankful that I don't have a camera. [00:39:02] Speaker B: Actually. [00:39:03] Speaker A: I don't. No, it doesn't work. [00:39:04] Speaker B: No. Especially with the new ones. That could be to your phone. Someone could just hack in and see you live in your world. [00:39:12] Speaker A: I'm throwing up everywhere. [00:39:13] Speaker B: Yeah, I think about it all the time. It's so terrifying. [00:39:15] Speaker A: Wait, that's like a little medicated. [00:39:17] Speaker B: Oh, okay, folks. We might get any medication after this. [00:39:21] Speaker A: I know. [00:39:24] Speaker B: Okay. What if my toddler locks me out of the house and I freeze to death in my robe? [00:39:28] Speaker A: Okay. No, you're fine. It's like home alone. [00:39:30] Speaker B: Shit. What if I fall asleep in the bath and drown, but the kids are still knocking on the door asking for goldfish? [00:39:39] Speaker A: That's medicated. [00:39:40] Speaker B: It hasn't happened to me, but I could actually see myself just falling asleep. I would never fall asleep. [00:39:45] Speaker A: I could never be in a bath. [00:39:47] Speaker B: So that's not me neither. I don't, like, have a nice tub at home, but if I did, maybe. What if a car tire explodes on the highway and slices my head off like Final Destination? [00:39:56] Speaker A: Okay, medicated. Medicated. [00:39:59] Speaker B: That wasn't me. What if the dog eats a diaper and explodes while we're at target? Is that dog explodes? If a dog eats a diaper, could the diaper explode? Expand in the dog's stomach and explode? I don't need that. [00:40:14] Speaker A: Somewhere. [00:40:15] Speaker B: Yeah, I don't know. [00:40:16] Speaker A: I never heard of that. [00:40:16] Speaker B: I never heard of that. [00:40:17] Speaker A: Oh, that's fucking medicated, though. This dog's dead asleep. So fine. [00:40:20] Speaker B: And he cried for me. He did. What if I get stuck in the garage door like a slice of bread in a toaster? [00:40:26] Speaker A: Why are you. Did you look up Final Destination? Intrusive thoughts. These are not normal intrusive thoughts. [00:40:31] Speaker B: I think they are. [00:40:31] Speaker A: No, they are not. [00:40:32] Speaker B: I think people have these thoughts. [00:40:34] Speaker A: I'm thinking, like, intrusive thoughts. Like. [00:40:36] Speaker B: Like what? These are. These are thoughts that are unrealistic that pop into people's brains. [00:40:42] Speaker A: Oh, my God. I don't like that one. Medicated. Medicated. What is that? [00:40:47] Speaker B: What if I mix up the Tylenol and Motrin dose and my kids overdose because I can't do math? [00:40:52] Speaker A: I kind of had that. So medicated. [00:40:55] Speaker B: Okay, last one. What if I get abducted out of the shoprite parking lot and my kid is already buckled in the car? [00:41:00] Speaker A: Oh, intrus of medicated. Because I need medication for that reason. [00:41:03] Speaker B: You think about that? [00:41:04] Speaker A: Yeah, I. It's scary. Like, I'm at whole food. I get my girl lock my door. [00:41:08] Speaker B: Tell me your, like, how you put your groceries away and your kid. What's the order? [00:41:13] Speaker A: I do. [00:41:15] Speaker B: You're. You're driving the cart up to your car. Then what? [00:41:17] Speaker A: Groceries in the car. [00:41:18] Speaker B: So you. You turn your back and put the groceries in while your kid is still in the cart. [00:41:22] Speaker A: Yeah, but he's. He's like, I'm holding the car, but, like. [00:41:25] Speaker B: What do you mean? [00:41:25] Speaker A: I'm like, okay, he's in front of me. [00:41:27] Speaker B: I'm not judging, I'm just asking. [00:41:29] Speaker A: I would never put my kid in the car seat and put the groceries in. Someone can hop in my car and Drive away with my kid. My kid is staying with me. [00:41:35] Speaker B: Oh. I put my kids in the car first. [00:41:38] Speaker A: Never. [00:41:38] Speaker B: And buckle them in. [00:41:39] Speaker A: Never. [00:41:40] Speaker B: Why? [00:41:40] Speaker A: Someone could easily jump. I know you're in your trunk putting your groceries in your doors. [00:41:45] Speaker B: I don't. I put. I. Well, I. [00:41:47] Speaker A: Or even your side door. [00:41:48] Speaker B: Shut the door, and I lock them and I do the trunk. But, yeah, you're right. [00:41:51] Speaker A: The trunk is open. The door is not locked. Your trunk is open. Your door is not locked. [00:41:55] Speaker B: Are you sure? [00:41:55] Speaker A: Yeah. So I do groceries. [00:41:57] Speaker B: I wonder why I think about kids always getting stolen. [00:42:00] Speaker A: Like, I do groceries. [00:42:01] Speaker B: Okay. [00:42:02] Speaker A: In my backseat. [00:42:03] Speaker B: I also have three kids, so, like, them all. They can't all be, like, standing in the parking lot. Like, I need to get them in the car. [00:42:09] Speaker A: Yeah. Like, I would, like, put Joey, like, standing in the trunk. I would, like, let Vienna sit in the trunk, like, while I'm putting my groceries in the trunk. And, like, Rocco's, like, sitting in the car. So whatever I do Geo put. I'm sorry. Gio's next to me in the shopping cart. I'm, like, in and out. Like, he's right next to me putting my groceries in. [00:42:24] Speaker B: Then we both go to bring the cart back. [00:42:27] Speaker A: Bring the cart back. He's still in it. Then I take him out, I carry him to the car, put him in, and then I get in. [00:42:36] Speaker B: Okay. [00:42:36] Speaker A: What do you do? [00:42:37] Speaker B: I get all the kids in the car, put the groceries in the car, shut the doors, lock the doors, run the cart back, and then go. [00:42:45] Speaker A: Oh, my God, you do? [00:42:47] Speaker B: Yeah, because I don't. Because if I take, if I take. Well, first of all, I never, I rarely ever go to the food store with all three. Yeah, right. So that's like, a lie. I, I, I have done it. But, like, I don't if. Typically, I don't bring the kids at all. [00:42:59] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:43:00] Speaker B: Like, I try really hard to go to the food store when I have no kids because Vienna's fine to take. Rocco's okay to take Joey. Fuck no. [00:43:08] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:43:08] Speaker B: But I really try to go without kids. So if I go without kids, I. [00:43:10] Speaker A: Mean, either way, whatever you do is fine. But if you have a better way, let me know. [00:43:13] Speaker B: I mean, it's scary, though. Either way. You're kidding. [00:43:16] Speaker A: That's like an intrusive thought. [00:43:17] Speaker B: Or you could get taken. [00:43:18] Speaker A: Or I, like, I'm. No wonder why my mom gets nervous. Like, now that I've already intrusive thoughts. Like, I feel like when I'm walking the baby and the dog. [00:43:25] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:43:26] Speaker A: First of all, what do I do? If a dog attacks, what do I. [00:43:28] Speaker B: Do about that, too? That's. [00:43:30] Speaker A: So. [00:43:30] Speaker B: Are these intrusive thoughts or are other moms. Are we just scared or do you just, like, worry because, like, you're a mom? [00:43:37] Speaker A: I don't know. There's so many things. But anyway, all in all, this was a very dark episode. [00:43:43] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:43:43] Speaker A: But it's realistic because it happens often. And. [00:43:47] Speaker B: Yeah. I mean, car accidents happen all the time. Like, and it's funny because I. I was thinking about this. Like, I hope, God willing, that we can go to Florida for Thanksgiving, like, on a plane. Like, I'm so scared of flying, but, like, you, it is so much more likely to get in a car accident with your family than on a. Than a plane accident, which is so crazy because, like, you drive. Yeah. And you drive all the time. [00:44:07] Speaker A: That's because you're in control. In a car. [00:44:09] Speaker B: Yeah. Just cars and Ubers. Everything's scaring me right now. [00:44:12] Speaker A: Anyway, I'm praying for those girls and their lives and their family's lives. Let's just, like, moment of silence for real. [00:44:18] Speaker B: Okay. [00:44:19] Speaker A: I really am, and I'm so sorry you went through that. We could talk about it offline. Like, I'm here for you on a. [00:44:24] Speaker B: Real note in real life, but, like. [00:44:26] Speaker A: Whatever else is going on in your life, because now I'm pissed anyway. I hope this. Like, if anything, put your seatbelt on. Don't drink and drive also. And stop fighting. [00:44:36] Speaker B: I just. Yeah, I just. If. If anyone could take anything from this episode. I know there are a lot of moms watching. First of all, I think it really is important to have a plant. Like, I asked my husband, I was like, do we have, like, a living will? Like, and we don't. We have. We have life insurance, and we have life insurance, but we don't have, like, an actual living will. [00:44:51] Speaker A: You don't? [00:44:52] Speaker B: No. We need to make one. Yeah. [00:44:53] Speaker A: Michael has one. [00:44:54] Speaker B: You have a living will. Like, you. You know exactly what. Okay. [00:44:56] Speaker A: That's good, I think, right, hon? Who told me that? [00:44:59] Speaker B: Well, her. Her husband does life insurance. But Joe always said. He always jokes. He says, I. You are. I am more. You are. You are so rich. When I die. But if you die, I get, like, nothing. [00:45:11] Speaker A: No, I know. Same. Michael's like, you should kill me today. [00:45:13] Speaker B: Yeah. Joey's like, you should kill me. You'll be really rich. I'm like, I need you. [00:45:17] Speaker A: I know. No, I can't. I would. No. But I'm very thankful that I haven't had anybody. But, you know. [00:45:23] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:45:24] Speaker A: People. I Haven't had that many traumatic events in my life. I'm thankful for that. Or, like, somebody, like, immediate family. Pass. [00:45:30] Speaker B: Yeah. That's a whole nother. [00:45:33] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:45:33] Speaker B: Thing. But I just want people to take away that life is precious. Like, it is so, so precious, and you should enjoy it. I know that there are bumps along the way and there are things that happen, and obviously, like, I'm not saying just don't care about the little things that happen in life, but think about the bigger picture. Think about what you want your legacy to be. Like, what you want to, like, leave to your children. Like, how you want them to think about their childhood and just, like, I don't know, be a little lighter, laugh a little more, and just hug. Yeah. [00:46:06] Speaker A: I love you. [00:46:06] Speaker B: I love you, too. [00:46:07] Speaker A: You're gonna be okay. You're a good person, and you live like that. So that's. That's all you can ask for. [00:46:13] Speaker B: Yeah. I mean, it was definitely. Definitely. [00:46:16] Speaker A: I'm sure. But again, if you know or have been or have gone through something like this or personally have gone through something like this, like, you've actually lived the scene. You know, we're always here, me and Emily, to chat about stuff like that. [00:46:31] Speaker B: Here to talk. We are. [00:46:32] Speaker A: We're here to talk. [00:46:32] Speaker B: And it's love to hear from you. [00:46:34] Speaker A: And it's real life. And like Emily said, just to reiterate, life is precious, and you only have one. You have one fucking life. Live it to your fullest. [00:46:41] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:46:42] Speaker A: And I feel like as soon. I feel like I've always lived like that. [00:46:45] Speaker B: Yeah. But I kind of want to book a trip. Like, why are we saving money? Like, we could die. Let's book something. [00:46:50] Speaker A: That's what I say to Michael all the time. Like, you worry about, like, all this stuff that you do and, like, save for. It's like, what are we saving for? [00:46:58] Speaker B: That's where my mom's at right now. She, like. Like, she wants to go away. She's like. Well, like, I. I don't know how many years I have left of, like, actually, like, being able to, like, get on a plane. Get on the plane, like, play with my grandkids, like, do the things that she loves to do. [00:47:12] Speaker A: This. This kind of made me, like, all whacked. I know. [00:47:14] Speaker B: So just live your life, people. [00:47:16] Speaker A: Live your life to your fullest. And we love you, and we're here for you. And Emily needs a cocktail. [00:47:21] Speaker B: I'm going out today. I'll let you guys know if I have fun tonight. We're gonna try to have some fun. [00:47:24] Speaker A: Fun is in. [00:47:25] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:47:26] Speaker A: Okay, well, that wraps up episode 17. So, like, follow, subscribe. Yeah, always. Thank you for tuning in. The ones that do and the ones that don't be better. [00:47:38] Speaker B: Our website. You guys are buying. [00:47:40] Speaker A: You guys are buying so much merch. We love that. Thank you so much. We love everyone who's supporting us, and we appreciate it so much. We really, really, really do. And we try to make that known that we appreciate you. And that's it for now. [00:47:52] Speaker B: Off. [00:47:52] Speaker A: I almost said, folks. [00:47:54] Speaker B: No, I'm not rubbing off on you in that. Okay, well, take off your outfit so I can put it on right now, naked. [00:48:00] Speaker A: My God. All right, well, we love you. Bye. [00:48:05] Speaker B: Bye. Danny out.